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beard life

Sacrifice Your Beard for a Wedding? Don’t Automatically Surrender!

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Should you sacrifice your beard for a wedding or some other special occasion? Proceed with caution. Keep an open mind and focus on preserving and nurturing your relationship with the person requesting that you get rid of your beard. Be understanding, flexible, and willing to bend, if necessary, for the sake of family ties.

Is someone pressuring you to shave your beard for a wedding? Would it happen to be the bride-to-be? There have been many cases in which brides-to-be have asked members of the wedding party to divest themselves of their beards. Each situation is unique and should be carefully evaluated in the context of the interpersonal relationships. However, do not allow intimidation to send you immediately to the razor without exploring your options!

Should you shave your beard for a wedding? Featured beard image 2: Barry.
Classic full beard: Barry. Click on image to view larger.

What’s the deal with the “no beards in my wedding” requirement?

Just about any man can be vulnerable to wedding beard-removal pressure. Targets may include any or all of the following:

  • groom
  • groomsmen
  • best man
  • father of the bride
  • father of the groom
  • other relatives of either the bride or the groom

Of course, a bride’s wedding day is her big day. She dreams of it all being perfect. That’s understandable. Keep in mind how important this is to her.

But why should a man’s beard be targeted for removal? Who else gets pressured to make such a major change to their physical appearance for a wedding?

Well, it’s not really a fair request to begin with. Don’t dismiss it out of hand. But don’t immediately give up, either. Exploring your options could be a learning and growth opportunity for all involved. Focus on building your relationship with the beard-removal requester. That is likely more important than the potential temporary loss of a beard.

Should you shave your beard for a wedding? Featured beard image 3: Barry.
Classic full beard: Barry. Click on image to view larger.

Wedding photos with or without beards?

Frequently, the “problem” isn’t with the man being bearded at the wedding. Many times, the problem is that the requester does not want beards in the wedding photos.

The “no-beard” rule may be applied with seemingly random standards. How about the case of the groom being permitted his beard, but the rest of the men in the wedding party must be beard-free? Often, you cannot make it make sense.

Wedding photos are intended to capture the event and the people who take part. Consider the case of a man who is normally bearded, with the beard being a well-established part of his appearance and identity. If he shaves his beard specifically for the wedding, his beardless appearance in the wedding photos represent a temporary artificial representation of himself. He will not appear in the photos in the way that people have known him. He may not even be recognizable to those who know him.

Another thing is that perhaps it’s important to the man that he appear in the photos with his beard. When he and others look at the photos years later, they will see the unfamiliar beardless face instead of the regular bearded face they know and love.

For the man who gave up his beard for the wedding, it may seem strange to see himself in photos without his beard. He may not like that his beard was missing from his appearance at the event. That’s not a big deal. But it can feel funny. I have felt something similar when seeing myself in a photo of a special event before I was able to grow a beard. I look at the photo and think, “Gee. I wish I could have been bearded in this photo.” Again, it’s not anything major. It’s just kind of an unexpected feeling.

Should you shave your beard for a wedding? Featured beard image 4: Barry.
Classic full beard: Barry. Click on image to view larger.

Respect the feelings of the one requesting “no beards”

Yes, it’s not really fair to ask a man to shave his beard for a wedding or some other special occasion. However, always keep in mind that for the person making this request, it’s their very special day. Don’t take a hardline approach. Handle with genuine care and respect.

Have a lighthearted conversation with the requester to make your feelings known. Gently see if you can win acceptance of your beard for the event. If the delicate negotiation succeeds, then great! Problem solved…you hope.

Should you shave your beard for a wedding? Featured beard image 5: Barry.
Classic full beard: Barry. Click on image to view larger.

If gentle negotiation fails

If the requester cannot be gently persuaded to drop the beard-shaving requirement, stay calm and cool. At this point it all comes down to preserving the relationship or not. If you want to preserve the relationship, you’ll have to step up and agree to shave. Yes, it’s not fair. Yes, you do not want to lose your beard, even for a short time. But make the person happy and agree to get rid of your beard for the big day. It’s an investment in the future happiness of your relationship.

Should you shave your beard for a wedding? Featured beard image 6: Barry.
Classic full beard: Barry. Click on image to view larger.

Here’s the upside to sacrificing your beard for the wedding

Despite the unfairness of being pressured to change your appearance in a big way that others are not, you’ve taken an important step to protect your relationship with the requester. Don’t resent having gotten rid of your beard. Again, view it as an investment.

You may be justified in feeling that sacrificing your beard for a wedding was unfair. You may feel that giving in will only embolden the requester to continue similar behavior in the future. That may be. But if there were ever a time to let it slide, this would be it.

The big bonus is that after it’s all over, you are free to grow again. Enjoy the pleasure of growing and experiencing the glorious and triumphant return of your beloved beard! You deserve it.

shaving

When You’ve Gotta Do It: The Expert Guide to Shaving Off Your Beard

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Shave off your beard? Really???!!!

Sometimes it’s unavoidable. It could result from a change in your employment situation. It could be required for a medical procedure. It might be to benefit a charity fundraiser. Or it could be that a beard just doesn’t work for you. But one day you may be facing a need to shave off your beard.

Shaving off your beard doesn’t mean that you’re being disloyal to the bearded brotherhood. It could just represent a temporary time-out until your next beard-growing opportunity presents itself. It’s been said that one of the best things about shaving off your beard is that it enables you to experience the pleasure of growing it out again. Whenever a beard is shaved off, the potential for its return is always present.

Prepare to say farewell to your beard

So if you’ve got to shave off your beard, you ought to do it the right way.  Do you know how to shave off a beard?  Our guide will teach you how to shave off your beard easily, like a pro.  Before you get started, however, make sure you have all the necessary gear on hand:

  • beard trimmer, electric hair clippers, or scissors
  • optional: electric razor
  • towels
  • mirror
  • shaving cream or equivalent (Do not use soap!)
  • razor
  • moisturizer

Step 1: Shear off your beard

Before you actually do any shaving, your first task is to remove as much of the beard hair as possible. The easiest way is to use a beard trimmer with the trimming guard removed or use ordinary electric hair clippers.

Just ahead of the beard-shearing operation, you may want to use a towel or cloth to cover your work space to catch the hair cut from your beard. Or, if you’re working over a sink, you may just close the drain and let the sink catch all the beard hair. Then you can use some bathroom tissue to sweep all of it up and out of the sink for disposal.

Now, using the beard trimmer or hair clippers before the mirror, carefully shear off as much of the beard hair as possible. A more labor-intensive alternative is to snip off your beard hair with scissors. If you choose to use scissors, you’ll get better results with a good pair of scissors designed for cutting hair. At this point, an optional step is to use an electric razor to refine the removal of what remains of your beard.

After ridding yourself of as much beard hair as you can, you’re ready to move on to step two: the real shave. Your newly-exposed skin is no longer accustomed to being shaved, especially if you count your bearded time in years. This situation calls for taking extra care to prepare your skin. Proper skin preparation will help prevent or minimize irritation and ingrown hairs.

Step 2: Shave for the first time after shearing off your beard

Here’s some expert advice on carrying out that critical first post-beard shave:

First, use a hot towel which will utilize steam to soften the outer layer of the hair. Next, be aware that using too much or too little shaving cream affects how you properly prep the skin. Using too little of a product might not soften the hair enough, while using too much of a product can become a slippery mess just asking for nicks and cuts.

Now before putting razor to skin, it’s important to navigate your grain pattern. Slide your fingers across the skin to feel which way your hair is growing. When shaving, the first stroke of shave should go with the grain when the hair is at its longest. The next stroke should go against the grain when the hair is shorter. This will relieve any tug and pull on the skin while leaving the area smooth. It’s important to remember not to put too much pressure on your skin while shaving. Gently gliding the razor across your skin will work best for a close shave.

Step 3: Finish up by soothing your newly-shaved skin

Lastly, it’s important to remember that shaving can leave your skin dry. This is even more important to keep in mind when it comes to shaving off your beard. That skin on your face hasn’t experienced the elements in a while, so it’s likely to be even more sensitive. Don’t forget to apply a moisturizer after and you’re good as new!

You’re beard-free again…for now!

With that, you’ve officially returned to the beardless world. Be sure to take a good long look in the mirror and let it sink in what you have done. The bearded brotherhood bids a fond goodbye and wishes you well. We remain eager to welcome you back whenever you have the opportunity to grow your beard again!

Of course, whenver you are ready to grow your prized beard again, be sure to follow our proven guide on how to grow a beard.